Anger

I was looking at a book recently prepping for my Understanding Anger group when I came across something very interesting. For the clients in my group there seems to be a two way split. There are those who get angry and explode and then there are those that avoid anger at all costs, and if they do get angry stuff it. Stuffing an emotion can be done both consciously and unconsciously. This book I was looking at had a whole chapter dedicated to "the stuffer."

Sometimes I find that people confuse the emotion of anger to reactions made in anger and believe it's interchangeable. Here are some ditty's I found interesting from this chapter:

1. the stuffer doesn't offer much in the way of intellectual stimulation because he's wary of conflict and won't risk angering you by expressing opinions and/or ideas that differ much from your own. I think this is quite unfortunate. I love a good debate.

2. Some stuffers are not so much "nice" as they are cool. Nothing ever fazes them. they give the impression of being in complete control of themselves in any and all situations. Cool stuffers are sometimes admired, sometimes envied. I think my clients would say this is me.

AND MY FAVORITE

3. Stuffers sometimes, though of course not always, run to fat. It's almost as though stuffing food helps them keep their anger stuffed.

To this I would argue that people often use fat or food to stuff unpleasant emotions not just anger. Disappointment, sadness, loneliness, feeling unfulfilled...I think some people find food to be a way to somehow fill a void. Seeking the comfort and reliability of food to fill. But then sometimes even food doesn't satisfy and they continue to eat and eat. I think there's some truth to that.

I'd also like to point out that there are things besides food that people turn to. I'd argue exercise is also something some people use to satisfy the unsatisfied. Shopping or buying could also be used.

I remember a few years ago and article in the Ensign magazine that was called filling the void. It was short but very interesting. I really related to it because the author was talking about filling the void with music. I think I do all these things at different times. There are times the music can't be loud enough, or I can't run far enough, I just want to eat. I also believe that that's ok.