Tuesday, August 26, 2008

my own mental status exam

I'm a little stressed this week. I'm moving. I can't wait, but I'm a tad stressed. Last night I got home and realized I had successfully avoided, yet again, doing anything productive to prepare for my move. I had that oh-so familiar queasy feeling in my stomach. The one that usually comes around every mid-terms and finals season, when I have a 25 page paper due in 3 days and I've only done some basic research. I can usually bank on two long nights, but always squeaking out that last page, getting it in right on time. This is what I keep telling myself, "It will all work out. It always does."

But I still get stressed. Signs that I'm stressed: my leg is bouncing as I sit in my office chair (not a usual thing for me), I just want to eat, I start to freak out about anything and all things. This one is actually quite humorous because it's so unnecessary, yet incredibly real!

Things I'm freaked out about because I'm stressed:

1. I had a break light out and was SURE the popo's would find me, finally ask me for my license, realize I'm licensed in another state, car's registered in another state, they'd impound my car, take my license and I'd end up owing thousands of dollars for whatever reason to whatever Massachusetts agency.

2. I've gained weight. Like not really, not on a scale, but I haven't been running like I used to and haven't been swimming lately and I feel gross. I then start to notice all kinds of unsettling things like the fact that I've gained weight, but not really.

3. I kinda like this boy. That's all I have to say about that. BUT I will say, it's fun to be a little bit giddy. I hope that giddy feeling lasts. In order to make it last I must NEVER talk to him, thus avoiding the opportunity for him to ruin my giddy feeling.

4. Summer's coming to a close and soon it'll be really really really cold. I should have done something more with my summer. Stupid real job.

5. I'm afraid my car's going to break down. There is no reason for this, just an impending feeling of doom and dread.

I hope this move goes smoothly. All these things will take care of themselves. I realize they are not rational thoughts (thanks CBT) but they're there. As far as my mental status goes, I'd say increased anxiety, thought process jumbled at best, oriented x 3, still presents well-kempt appropriately dressed, hygiene intact.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Tears of Joy?

I had a conversation with my father recently. Both of us are in the mental health field and we often talk about human behavior and thought processes. We were discussing crying. My father said that sometimes you hear people talk about tears of joy, but that there really was no such thing. All tears are a result of some kind of sadness or loss. I disagreed with him and so we discussed. At the end of our discussion I could see his argument. Very often our tears are linked to a loss or sadness although we may be happy for someone else.

BUT I still have one holdout. Sporting events--mostly the Olympics. I have cried before watching the Olympics. I remember a few tears of JOY dropping when Kerri Strug nailed her landing in the 96 games. It was amazing! I remember a few tears of JOY dropping when Brandi Chastain scored the final goal in the shoot out winning the women's world cup in 1999. I'm not sure what those tears are about but I can't find a sadness. I think it's recognizing the pain and the work and the dedication and then the final payout...AHHH, I get goose bumps just thinking about it!!

It leads me to this. Michael Phelps. I watched every single event. I was a competitive swimmer for many years and to watch this man swim gave me chills!! CHILLS!! The team unity and support of Lezak, Piersol, and everyone else just supporting him and watching him dominate and do so much for the sport is incredible. This article articulates it perfectly. I get chills again reading it and the tears come to my eyes.

So what about that? Is that sadness Pop? What do you guys think?

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Ushering in my 29th year...

We ventured on a Boston Harbor Cruise featuring the ultimate Guns and Roses cover band: APPETITE FOR DESTRUCTION!!!!Only those brave enough made the trip and the true rockers surfaced.
Peggy and I
My co-worker also celebrated her boyfriends birthday on board with their friends. It was a huge bash and a night to remember!
There was much dancing and working the wind!
The crowd was tough but we were tougher. Maintaining the whole evening alcohol free when your feet were being sloshed and the air stale!
The true, the proud, the beautiful in our Paradise City, on a boat smaller than you'd think!

I usually hate this stuff

but i'm learning to stop hating. I actually found this stupid quiz fun to do. Granted I'm at work and just had it out with a client, but I like my result. (because I like the description. I was hoping for Bell). I guess that explains a bit of why Ariel always annoyed me. Stubborn. Takes forever to learn the same lessons.

You Are Ariel!
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Headstrong and fiesty. You have a mind of your own that's full of romantic dreams about the world around you. Exploring exotic places is your ultimate dream, and although you can be a little naive you'll realize that there is something to be gained from your family's wisdom.

Which Disney Princess Are You?

and yes I did link to the quiz from the ssbblog. I did look at it today.